Resisting the Urge to Diet | Weekly Update 9.7.21 | Holly T. Baxter
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Holly T. Baxter, A.P.D.
Online Nutrition & Physique Coach
World Champion Natural Fitness & Figure Model
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APD: Accredited Practicing Dietitian
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Huh okay let me just get in the zone hey Guys welcome back so I just had to uh do a quick actually Let's hold off on filming right now Because i've got an issue and then i'm Back in i'm like oh no we're back and Then we had to go back and forth for a Hot minute and now we're good so let's Get stuck into this week's update we had Uh quite a few events this week uh in Our i guess personal lives we had uh one Uh five-year-old's birthday party That is our daughter olivia we had the Grandparents in town and Lots of i guess events and eating out And just kind of spending some time with Um the family so i think i always still Have a little bit of like Apprehension about what might happen in These situations because historically For me um there's probably a lot of Stress associated um and perhaps some Negative memories of not necessarily Like the the events that took place it's More about how i internalize A lot of that extra stress and pressure And then what that's led to you know in Past experiences so i really tried to Kind of go into this new week with a Really open mind and try not to preempt Anything you know otherwise that can Lead to you know feelings of anxiety or Stress that might not even be there so You know something that i think i am
Really good at is um not letting let's Say for example like fear hold me back From you know taking action on doing Something or of you know this goal that I have you know there's a good chance That i might not be able to do it but You know you have to commit to it anyway So i tried to look at this kind of with That lens rather than going into the Week thinking oh this is going to be Really hard oh my god i can't do this You know I'm going to have anxiety i was like Well you can do all this other stuff Fine so all right let's use that same Approach um to how we go into this new Week So it actually turned out just fine one Of the things i think that i have had to Do Is a lot of inner soul-searching in the Last few months I'm going to say it's probably really The last year or so it just feels like It's continuous soul-searching you know What what do you want in your life what Do you want to get out of your life and If so once you've decided all these Things Okay you have to start taking some Actionable steps to get there and for me I think i really had to start putting up Some more definitive like boundaries and Saying no in situations that i might not
Really have the means or time to do but I feel obligated and you know if i look At all of those things That i kind of commit myself to It's so unrealistic that i end up Getting really upset at myself i let People down and it's just not a good way To be yeah this week i really kind of Had a good think about what can i Actually do this week what's realistic How much can i fit in i know you want to Do all the things but you know let's Let's go down there and actually tick Off what makes sense So i kind of got rid of a lot of the Fluff this week and stopped kind of Overloading myself and surprise surprise It actually went a whole lot better and I know i felt significantly less Stressed And my anxiety probably got to you know Maybe a 7 out of 10 On a couple of like you know moments or Things that i was doing but it was for The most part pretty good nutrition on The other hand that was I think as we go and take a look at Carbon uh today am i tracking i don't Really know what i attract it was very Much okay what are your priorities this Week i've got these you know new work Things that i'm kind of processing and Organizing and then i have you know the Family are here that's the reality we do
Have the kids and we have you know some Big events So i had to really just prioritize And my nutrition this week was one of Those things that was kind of swinging To the left of the pendulum For this week and in past videos and Even some of my social media posts i've Really talked about you know what is Balance uh how can you achieve a Balanced lifestyle and i really don't Think that you know Anything is ever like static On that i call it a pendulum because i Do think Everything kind of constantly shifts and Moves around and learning to kind of be Okay with having this area of your life Over here Perhaps not where it normally is but It's shifted for a temporary period of Time to accommodate something else So for me this week i was trying to Think about this from my eating Disordered point of view so what would i Usually do or what would the old holly Do in the situation and i think i was Very you know rigid on my you know Ability to let it go I always had that um you know you've got To prioritize this is your number one Your body your body image you have to be This certain way diet tracking blah blah Blah that's always um you know at the
Top of the list i'm like you know what No like i feel that doesn't feel good Anymore i don't want to be like that and Whatever happens this week even if i put On Five kilos let's say okay it's a Temporary change nothing is permanent You can always you know go about things You know next week and the week after And get yourself back on track like You know it's a little bit more that That mindset to me Feels better it kind of sits better with My principles and my morals so This week i don't think i tracked on Sunday at all which is the first time in A while obviously as a competitor that's Not really something you can do to be Honest especially when you're trying to Get to that level of conditioning at a Pro level you know fitness model so it's Been a while since i haven't tracked and It felt really good i think i just Really enjoyed you know those few or Think it was a whole afternoon and a Following day i think it was saturday Afternoon and sunday i didn't track Um and it was really nice to kind of Feel like a connection with the people That i was with it was it was really Nice to kind of sit down and Just enjoy Their company and not be thinking about The nutrition value of the foods that i
Was eating And something else that i did as well And again just trying to embrace the Non-competitive lifestyle or the really Rigid and extreme approach which is what Was needed the weeks leading up to my Show i really wanted to kind of just eat What everyone else was eating so i Thought about you know stopping and Getting a couple of like fat free or low Fat options um to better kind of you Know be more compliant with my macro Targets i was like you know what i never Do that i never do this like what's one Day so i got some work stuff done for The most part on sunday morning and into The early afternoon once i kind of Wrapped that up i was like okay all Right well i guess we'll go and be Normal and we had this gorgeous big Platter We sat up on the rooftop had some wine And like all the cheeses like six or Seven different types of cheese and some Meats and some like fig jams and honey And nuts and like just all the good Stuff and i was like you know what try a Bit of everything like go for it eat Until you're full and satisfied and that You know be done with it um so it was Really nice um if i had to guess and you Know it's nice to kind of think back and Go what was i really stickly eating i Probably had like three or three maybe 4
000 calories on that one day because They were all the full fat options and They're not very Low calorie let's be real a one ounce Serving of cheese usually has like nine Grams of fat we're looking at very Calorically dense foods so even though i Didn't eat Like a huge volume of that food it was Definitely very dense so you know i when I kind of got up the next day i can see I look a little bit different sure like You just ate a lot more like you would Expect that what was really interesting About that particular moment was i think As somebody that has recovered from Disordered eating There's always this little voice that Will just come back and try and test you It's like it never actually goes away um It's something that you carry with you And i'm kind of like bring it on like i Got you i've got this so it was like you Know going holly probably should just Diet for a couple of days like just cut Your calories just go back into the Setting on carbon just diet for a week You know you'll be fine i was like no Like no no i don't want to do that So Despite that voice saying you should Probably diet this week because you've Probably put on a kilo or two i just was Like no i'm gonna keep my calories right
Where they are so interestingly this Week i also still know that i have had To mark um i'm close to my menstrual Cycle so when we go and have a look at The app um you'll see my check-in i Think i had to mark yes i am close Because i've been getting all the Symptoms and i don't know truly when i'm Going to get it but i can tell just the Increased bloating and just feeling like So emotional it's like emotional Rollercoaster like are we happy and Talking in the next minute i'm bawling My eyes out i can't tell you how many Times i have cried in the last seven Days like i went to church for the first Time ever to be honest i i grew up Without having a um religious upbringing And i kind of yeah i think i was like I'll be fine this is gonna be you know Let's let's see what comes of this and i Just walked i was like balling the Entire time like oh my god Like oh this is just it's just such a Bizarre feeling i think there was a lot Of emotions kind of happening for me in The last few weeks but anyway That's another story but um regardless i Stuck to my guns uh and i checked in and My co the coach has given me the same Macro targets again for this coming week And i've just gotten back on track i'm Not trying to restrict you know the First thing again that little voice when
I kind of got woke up on monday morning Was like oh why don't you just not hit Your targets today holly like just maybe Make ups for some of the calories that You ate on sunday and i was like no So i just had my targets and you know Within a few days probably a week let's Be real like i will get back to Um i guess where i was feeling Comfortable part of that difficulty i Think is just the physical discomfort That can sometimes come when we are Starting to introduce calories i can't Tell you the number of women that i have Worked with Over the years that have gone through This reverse diet process Where we're reintroducing calories you Know we're over time very gradually Taking out dietary fiber And they'll say to me they get to this Point and it might not even be like high Calories so you know to give you an Example of what we would consider normal Versus what's high most of my clients I'm trying to get their calorie intake Probably somewhere above 40 to 45 Calories per kilogram of lean body mass So you know obviously depending on what Your muscularity is you know you may Have higher intake than somebody that's A little bit lighter so that would be Considered high And again we have a really awesome table
Outlined in the reverse dieting guide That kind of shows you what that normal Range looks like for not only different Levels of muscularity or lean body mass But also for people that have different Levels of activity because obviously Someone that does seven hours of Training a day has significantly more Requirement than someone that does no Training so that table in that book the Reverse dieting guide Spells that out this point in the Reverse where a lot of people start to Feel like oh You know i think i'm getting really full And uncomfortable i just i don't feel Good anymore i feel so ah just yuck part Of this process is just learning to kind Of reacclimate to that Stretch factor that happens to our Stomach so we're now putting more food In it it's going to stretch a little bit More you know as our food is being Digested we're going to have a little Bit more abdominal distension Permanently because there's more in There so I think a lot of us tend to get really Kind of caught up or hung up on that Physical feeling of fullness so i think It's really important to kind of just Sit with that for a bit and try not to You know place any judgments on how you Feel in those could be weeks because
Truly it can take a little bit of time To readjust and then also play around With your meal timing and your food Volumes Those things can make a significant Difference i know a lot of folks Especially those that have perhaps a History of chronic dieting And restricting calories maybe they had A significant Amount of fiber in their diets And now as they kind of venture back up The calorie ladder they're trying to Fulfill those calorie requirements With very low calorie foods so lots of Dietary fiber things that are very Filling and i have seen so many times You know women you know under 2 000 Calories they're eating like 60 grams of Fiber because they are really trying to Avoid some of those more traditionally Um i guess frowned upon bad foods which We know there's no such thing so i've Kind of had to say hey well how about we Try to you know make some compromises Here let's bring that fiber down let's Get you back to a place where you aren't Feeling so physically full to give you You know a better experience and maybe That will be all it took because it's so Difficult if you are in constant pain to Feel good like whether it's you slashed Your arm you fell off your bike or Something like you don't feel good when
You're hurt or you're hurting and it's No different i think when we think about How our digestive system feels so rather Than immediately going i need a diet Because i don't feel good like sit with That or you know play around with those Um variables that i mentioned to see if You can feel physically better yeah That's kind of what happened for me this Week i'm going to go in and we'll have a Look at my actual data okay so opening Up um carbon we'll go have a look at the Me section all right so From monday through to sunday um my Average carbohydrate intake and this is Again excluding sunday which i didn't Log so I don't know 182 grams so it was a little bit more uh Balanced i guess throughout the course Of the week 239 265 222 i had a day earlier in the Week with 167. Saturday i stopped tracking how by the Time we got to the birthday so clearly That was you can see that that's what Happens when um you're distracted with Children it's like i don't have time for That Sorry that didn't happen um but You know my targets were 212. so we're Kind of i'm just kind of oscillating Around that area like it feels good it Feels fine
Let's have a look at my protein intake And i'm sure that's probably High Oh no it's not that bad okay well let's Exclude sunday because i didn't log Anything and if i use the previous Sunday as a more accurate reflection of What i ate My average probably comes out to Somewhere around 150 157 sorry That's actually good it's only five Grams kind of above or seven grams above What my targets have been and i usually Aim for that 145 to 150 on average per Day so you can see there Um i nailed that most days saturday i Stopped tracking but i know that i Definitely hit my protein on saturday That's just what i like to eat sunday i Ate so much deli meats that i know for a Fact just in that one sitting i Definitely hit my protein i definitely Lumped that all together i certainly had Like one bolus of protein that was Probably 150 grams So anyway that's protein fats Um that comes out to Let's see 59 grams which is again kind Of right on my target But again there's no sunday in there um Friday we went for dinner 103 Definitely ate all the good things on Friday sorry that was quite high Um we'll go and have a look at my
Average calorie intake for the week with The exception So it comes out to about 1809 so I've definitely reigned it back in quite A bit since the previous week i don't Think that i've had the same appetite um As the past week but part of that's Probably because i've put on a little Bit of body fat since the show and i'm Definitely feeling better um my Performance in the gym This week was really good um i felt Great i had two awesome sessions Um and i was just that that's perfect For me like i felt so good at this place Um so if i can kind of just hang out Here like that'll be great and i think If there are photo shoots and things That i might have to do you know it Doesn't really mean i've got to do a Whole lot of work to lean down if it's Something that's fitness related um but I also feel really good and comfortable In my own skin too when i'm just Doing my thing so Um overall i'd say it's been a pretty Good good week Okay so going to have a look at my Check-in i actually have already done This Because i am a little bit behind with Our long long Long weekend uh yesterday so my weight Um i think monday morning was 66.8 so
That's like one and a half kilos more Than last week but it was very inflated Um so it says here let's reevaluate next Week it appears your weight may have Been affected by your menstrual cycle so We don't know um your true weight please Continue to hit your macro targets and We'll evaluate your weight once it Normalizes so here we go i'm just going To have another Week hanging out on the same targets Um and No doubt by the end of the week i'll be Back where i was so really trying not to Guess let some of those old thought Processes and that mindset of you know Needing to be so focused on my body take Over or kick in i'm just You know thinking about what i really Enjoy and Like after having such a wonderful Weekend and some really great Conversations meaningful relationships Just happy staff i was like ah this is What's important to me you know so and Everyone will be different everyone has Their Uh their goals what's important to them Completely different to what might be Important to me so I know for my Happiness It extends far beyond the physical Appearance sure that can be great and
There's certainly many benefits of Having you know a healthy body weight Outside of You know the aesthetics you know Thinking about reducing the risk of Chronic disease From a mental health perspective we know There's significant benefits to exercise On conditions like depression and other Mental health Conditions so i i really value my mental Health and For me i think i'm really starting to Find you know what works best so guys Thank you so much for joining me and Listening in Um if you have any questions or if You've got any comments or feelings About what i've talked about today Because i'm sure many of these I guess topics might be relevant to some Of you please share those thoughts with Me i'm often on youtube reading all of Your comments and responding when i can Um i think for me it's really great to Know that something that has happened For me Is relatable to you guys and you know i Can help you kind of overcome some of The challenges that you might be Experiencing As you go through your own reverse diet So Uh please leave me a comment if you
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